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17 May 2008 @ 11:01 pm
Sin on Fire - 141 Pages  
Stats
Days: Not even counting anymore.
Pages Completed: 141
Pages Begun: 141
Per Day Average: ???
Specific Outline: XXI complete, XXII begun.


Page One Hundred Thirty-Three

Panel 1: A shot of Bella's face. She has angled her chin down and an eyebrow up, eyes narrowed and glinting.

No dialogue.


Panel 2: View of Dereth's steepled hands.

No dialogue.


Panel 3: Shot of Bella's teacup. It isn't steaming anymore.

No dialogue.


Panel 4: Dereth looks a little sheepish; his gaze slants to his right.

DERETH 1: Ah, yeah, you don't have to answer that.


Panel 5: Bella looks no happier.

BELLA 2: Oh no. I'll answer...


Panel 6: Shot of Bella's mouth in a grim, angry line.

BELLA 3: ...as soon as you apologize for asking.





Page One Hundred Thirty-Four

Panel 1: Dereth, looking straight at the reader, his expression flat. (Shot from over Bella's shoulder.)

No dialogue.


Panel 2: Dereth ducks his head down, eyes closed.

DERETH 1: I'm sorry I said that. You really don't--


BELLA (OP) 2: --I'm not sleeping with him.


Panel 3: An awkward moment. Bella and Dereth stare at each other in silence.

No dialogue.


Panel 4: Dereth looks away.

No diaogue.


Panel 5: Shot of the desert garden outside.

DERETH (OP) 3: Your relationship isn't what I thought it was, then. I apologize for thinking so poorly of you.


Panel 6: Bella, smiling wryly.

BELLA 4: You never learn, do you?





Page One Hundred Thirty-Five

Panel 1: Dereth smiles in return, equally wry.

DERETH 1: No, I guess not.


Panel 2: A shot of his mouth, the smile gone.

DERETH 2: Bella, I... If you really think she would be happier, that it would be better for her...


Panel 3: Bella looking up, in a shaft of sunlight, hope beginning to show on her face.

No dialogue.


Panel 4: Dereth's downcast eyes have narrowed, though not in anger. He's looking sadly at the tablecloth.

DERETH 3: ...then I'm willing to try your idea. Whether... Whether you find a new apartment or not.


Panel 5: Shot of half of Bella's face. Her visible eye has widened in shock.

No dialogue.


Panel 6: Shot of Bella from behind. She's raising one hand to cover her mouth.

No dialogue.





Page One Hundred Thirty-Six

Panel 1: Clearly, some time has passed. Bella and Dereth are standing in the sunlight outside the tea shop. (Distant shot.)

No dialogue.


Panel 2: They exchange a slightly stiff-looking hug, as if they still haven't figured out this whole physical contact thing.

No dialogue.


Panel 3: Shot of Dereth, looking up at the sun.

No dialogue.


Panel 4: Shot of Bella, with an odd, almost restrained smile. Her mouth is serene... mostly. Her eyes, however, are overjoyed.

SFX (Cell phone) 1: Cheep! Cheep! Cheep!


Panel 5: Shot of Bella, looking down as she pulls her phone out of its leather purse clip.

No dialogue.


Panel 6: Shot of the phone, in Bella's hand.

CELL PHONE 2: BAHAI AVVETH





Page One Hundred Thirty-Seven

Panel 1: Single page splash. It's a small coffeeshop at an instersection, complete with a logo of a dove in its roost. The windows are frosted, but the name of the coffeeshop is written on them. There's a sand/gravel garden in front of the coffee shop, and a steel grey wheelbarrow full of books.

TITLE 1 (on window) 1: ELEVEN


TITLE 2 (under Title 1) 2: GIFT

SIGN (on wheelbarrow) 3: Free book's





Page One Hundred Thirty-Eight

Panel 1: Triptych. Shot of Bahai, standing in the doorway, in black jeans and a black tee shirt. He's carrying some sort of black messenger bag as well. There's some sort of punk message on the tee shirt and a graffitti broken heart beneath the slogan. For once, his lower arms are visible, and so are the scars.

TEE SHIRT 1: abstinence is for virgins


Panel 2: Bella, in the same clothing she wore to see Dereth. She's seated at a table, her legs crossed at the ankle, one hand resting flat on the table.

No dialogue.


Panel 3: The empty seat across from Bella. Two steaming coffee cups sit on the table.

No dialogue.





Page One Hundred Thirty-Nine

Panel 1: Bahai takes his seat.

No dialogue.


Panel 2: Shot of his hand, curling around the coffee cup.

No dialogue.


Panel 3: Bella leans forward. Her lips are darker than they were before; in the time between the last scene and this one, she has put on make-up. She opens her mouth to speak.

BAHAI (OP) 1: So.


BELLA 2: So.


Panel 4: Profile of Bahai. He's sitting as if he's completely relaxed. But there's a faint line of tension, especially in his neck and in his arms. His knuckles have gone white.

BAHAI 3: It isn't going to happen, is it?


Panel 5: Bella, looking away. Her lips are dark.

No dialogue.


Panel 6: Bahai, his eyes narrowed.

BAHAI 4: At least have the courage to say it, Bella.





Page One Hundred Forty

Panel 1: Bella looks up at that, so sharply that some of her hair jerks upwards as well.

BELLA 1: Excuse me?


Panel 2: A shot of Bahai's arms. The scars are dark against his skin.

BAHAI 2: Just say I'm not the man you're looking for.


Panel 3: Bella arches an eyebrow.

BELLA 3: You may be right, but...


Panel 4: Profile shot of the two.

No dialogue.


Panel 5: Bahai, raising the coffee cup to his lips.

BAHAI 4: I think I met the man you do want. Black magician, thinks he's Hell's Boss, stops at nothing for anything?


Panel 6: Her eyes narrow, but she toys with her hair, studiously casual. She's trying to play it cool, but the tension in her body language shows she's the furthest thing from it.

BELLA 5: I see you've met Vinseth, then.





Page One Hundred Forty-One

Panel 1: Bahai clenches his hands into fists and lays them flat on the table, turns them wrist up and looks at the scars, clearly thinking.

BELLA (OP) 1: You're wrong about him, you know. He's... He believes.


Panel 2: Bahai looks up, realization dawning.

BAHAI 2: You envy that faith.


Panel 3: Bella closes her eyes.

No dialogue.


Panel 4: Bella opens her eyes, her lips pursed slightly.

BELLA 3: No. I'm sometimes afraid of that faith. For all that he's irreverent... He's a zealot. Our relationship is as complicated as we are.


Panel 5: Bahai cracks a knife-edged smile.

BAHAI 4: You really do love him.


Panel 6: The smile disappears.

BAHAI 5: I couldn't be him for you.


BELLA (OP) 6: I'm not fool enough to ask that.
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